Although the tradition of "giving the bride away" is considered incredibly outdated and very patriarchal, I think that the meaning behind the concept of a father walking his daughter down the aisle has changed in the last couple of decades. To me, it has become more of a symbol of parental support for the union, rather than a sign of male dominance.
Being a fairly traditional girl, I have always wanted my father to walk me down the aisle. Lately tough, I have been questioning my resolve in following this custom. As you may have deduced, my parents are divorced: They separated about 5 years ago. Even though everyone in my family is better off because of it, this situation produces a very complicated set of wedding issues (and a whole mixed bag of mental ones, but that's a story for another day).
Mainly, I am concerned about the fact that my father is not really representative of my family. He is definitely a part of it, but since he and my mother are no longer a unit, the "symbol of parental support" mentality that I have attached to the walk down the aisle doesn't seem complete. I would never dream of taking this honour away from him, I just wish that there was a way to acknowledge the fact that my mother is behind our union (individually) as well. I'd love to have them both walk me down, but their relationship is not very friendly, and I feel like keeping them apart as much as possible is the best way to avoid unnecessary conflict.
Come to think of it, the tradition of the father-bride, mother-groom dance doesn't really seem conducive for divorced families either: Why should only one side be acknowledged?
Do any of you come from divorced families? What did you do to ensure that both parents felt like they played an equally important role on your day?
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