Sunday, March 21, 2010

Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater (?)

I don't know about you, but the recent scandal surrounding the marriage of Sandra Bullock and Jesse James has really saddened me.  Doesn't it seem like more and more Hollywood men are cheating on their beautiful, talented, and intelligent wives with women that are less than worthy of their attentions?  I mean, has it even been a month since we listened to Tiger Woods publicly apologize for a string of affairs?  Before that, we had Reese and Ryan (how perfect were they?).  And who can forget Halle Berry and Eric Benet?  I mean, why in the world would anyone want to cheat on Halle Berry!?

Still, the Sandra Bullock/Jesse James scandal seems to be particularly vile, simply because this is a time when Sandra should be celebrating all of her success, and not going through such heartbreak.


This recent media outburst has really got me thinking about infidelity.  According to some statistics, 30-60% of all marriages will go through some type of infidelity in the course of their relationship.  That number seems mighty high to me.

Of course, this makes me think about what I would do if faced with this situation.  Mr. Pudding and I have discussed this in the past, and our opinions on the topic are very different.  Mr. Pudding has said that infidelity is a deal breaker for him.  I, however, think a little differently.  At this point, without having experienced infidelity first hand (and hoping that I never will), I feel that I would probably pull a Hillary in this instance.

(source)

Here is my reasoning:  Mr. Pudding (my partner) is not a cheater.  He is a very loyal and honest man.  I am not at all concerned about him ever being unfaithful to me.  So, if by some instance of bad luck, infidelity does become an issue in our relationship, I will put my trust in the fact that this was a once in a life time mistake that will never be repeated.  I think that I would be able to forgive.  Once.

Now, if I was married to a man for whom infidelity was a well known issue, I would probably treat the matter differently.  For example, did you know that, according to their prenump, Catherine Zeta Jones will be awarded 5 million dollars in a divorce settlement if Micheal Douglas cheats?  If I was marrying a man with a past like Micheal's, I'd probably take similar (if slightly less extreme) measures.


So, I'm curious:  Are you in the "forgive him" or "forget him" camp?  Is infidelity a deal breaker for you? 

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